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All The Better To Kill You With

“Hey Ben, are you busy?”

“Yup. I’m doing shiv research.”

“You’re so weird, what are you really doing?”

“Looking up shiv on the internet.”

“Why exactly?”

“I was trying to text shit and my t9 wrote shiv. So I needed to research it.”

“And what are you learning?”

“Duh, Sarah. Lots. The shiv is the favored weapon of inmates in prisons across the world.”

“Cool Ben, I’ll know what to kill you with if you don’t come hang these shelves on my wall.”

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