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Last night was the big launch party for the new issue of Wasatch Woman magazine. I wrote two features for this issue, so I was very excited to attend.

I got home from the day with plenty of time to get ready, but had a bit of a headache so I popped some Advil and decided to lie down on the couch for a few minutes until the headache was gone.

I woke up two hours later.

SHIT.

Knowing I was already 30 minutes late I didn’t have time to get ready. I quickly threw on the first clothes I saw, grabbed my purse and I was off.

While at a red light I looked in the mirror and realized my hair was a disaster. I ran my fingers through it, but it ended up looking even worse. Great. I’m the girl who goes to a party at an upscale salon with fuzzy hair.

At the next red light I tried to fix my bra. The straps needed to be tightened so I pulled down one side of my shirt for easy access. I do it in the bathroom all the time, so I didn’t think twice–until I heard the car next to me honking and looked up to see two teenage boys waving at me. Luckily the light turned green before I had a change to slit my own wrists.

I finally arrive at the party and the first thing I see is my editor, Pam, wearing the exact same shirt. The one time I wear a bright color instead of black and I end up with a doppelganger. Oh and Pam is pregnant, which means I looked like I was wearing a maternity shirt, too.

I’m naming my pretend baby Petunia. I’m also going to have a baby shower and request large bottles of vodka because I’m totally going to need them when I see the pictures from the party.