Asshole is my safe word. This title has nothing to do with the post, but it makes me laugh all the same.
Sometimes I try and be a good person, but my effort usually turns into a giant wad of embarrassment. Driving home from school today I saw my friend Jeff walking to the train station. His house is on my way home so I figured why not save him some time and give him a lift.
I pulled my car over and yelled out the window, “Hey jerk, wanna ride home?”
Well the jerk wasn’t Jeff. It was some stranger, who probably isn’t a jerk at all. Neither is Jeff, really, but I use the word jerk in a loving manner. Something a stranger wouldn’t know about me.
I should have explained the case of mistaken identity to the stranger, but noooooooo. Instead I sped off. Yup, that’s me. I flee when humiliated. That’s ALWAYS been my M.O.
Tomorrow that all changes, because tomorrow my new life M.O. will be: Just be an asshole already. You end up looking like one anyway.
Comments
Too funny. It could of only been better if it had been raining out.
Don’t hate me but your humiliating stories are my favorite.
This is exactly why I love you. Don’t ever change.
AHAHA! This sounds like something I would do. I also use the word “jerk” as a term of endearment.
My college roomate and I regularly called each other fag and flipped each other the bird as we drove by. It was all done out of love.