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tomorrow is the beginning of my christmas vacation, following tradition i passed out the obligatory office gifts today. last year it was usb lava lamps, this year i handed out diseases. i gave pmk a cold, jb a flesh eating bacteria, the office lush got beer yeast, and i gave the office dream boat mono–mostly so i could say just that.

i did keep syphilis for myself, not because it was the cutest and pink, but because i don’t want to be know as the girl who gave someone at work an std.

i went to see apocalypto tonight. it’s the holidays so the time to be charitable, right? i felt it was only right to put money towards mel’s rehab bills. don’t judge, it made me feel like a better person.

i had the day off yesterday so ben and i took the opportunity to finish up our christmas shopping. we were told my nephew, carter, wanted a pink thomas the tank engine. i was excited, since pink is my thing, then i saw the parking lot at toys r us. it was packed, and the only parking place i could find was next to a mini van parked very badly, forcing me to park very badly myself.

once we entered the store we quickly realized we were totally out of our element. kids were everywhere screaming. the only exposure i have to children is my niece and nephew, who are entirely too shy to be that loud in public.

we found the toy and left as quickly as possible. when we got out to my car there was a couple next to me trying to park where the mini van had been. they were having a very difficult time, since my car was crookedly taking up half their space. when i saw them getting out of their car, i begged ben to just keep walking. he didn’t. in fact he looked at me as he put the toys in the trunk and said, “sarah, why the hell did you park so crappy?”. the guy looked over at me and said, “yeah, sarah, this totally sucks”. i was humiliated and for once it wasn’t my fault!

i got hyper?? i wonder if this has anything to do with my purchase of the chipmunks christmas album today. probably…

Your Holiday Personality is Hyper

Any holiday activity is well suited to you – as long as you keep moving. Shop everywhere and anywhere. Create your own holiday cards. Make everyone on a your list a custom stocking of goodies!

read here for my bed tales.

i supppose i heart planets as much as the next guy, just not this particular guy:

in an effort to save a few bucks i decided to cut daisy’s nails myself rather than take her to the groomer. how hard could it be?

three bandaged paws later, i decided dog blood is the second worst smell in the entire world, only rating slightly above farm country. once she bled through the bandages i stuck her in the bathtub to avoid blood on my white carpet. four treats later she only hates me a little bit.

never, ever again–it’s totally worth the twenty bucks to have someone else do it. one more thing to add to the list of careers that aren’t for me.

i just got off the phone with ben. i had to inform him i found the perfect christmas gift for our dad! i heard on the radio you could adopt a wild horse or burro through the bureau of land management for only $25 bucks–and to think, we were just going to get him a pocket knife flashlight combo for $15.

marky and i went to the gym tonight. i forgot my ipod so he was nice enough to let me talk his ear off while we were on the treadmills. i asked him if he had heard the dictator from chile died today. when he asked how the news would affect the awesome blossom i realized he thought i meant the restaurant chain not the country! i might forget the ipod more often, he was way more entertaining than the newest killers album.

i promised him i wouldn’t blog it, obviously i lied.