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i’m finally at peace with my age. mostly.

today, at lunch i was stuck behind a group of teenagers who would not shut-up. they kept changing their order over, and over again. it reminded me how happy i am to know exactly what i want on my burrito and in life. it took every ounce of self control not to pull them aside and tell them they are like totally wasting their time with the incessant chatter about boys. i understand, as i was boy crazy at that age too, but look where it’s gotten me… i’m currently without man. in fact if we woman weren’t so damn crazy i’d consider that option. ok, that’s a lie, so don’t sending me emails requesting lesbian pictures.

but really, what i wouldn’t give to go back and do it all over again–not all of it i guess, i really don’t want the perm years back, that was bad enough the first time around. maybe i’m reminiscent of a time without eye wrinkles, or maybe i’m just upset over the fact i’m being faced with taking a chemistry class at 31. whatever the case, i’d forget the boys and concentrate on books.

dumb teenagers.

me: i noticed someone is reading my blog from the IRS, and i’m totally freaked out.

ak: well, unless you have something to hide i wouldn’t worry about it.

me: i thought i’d call paul newman for tax advice.

ak: i’d probably call robert redford instead.

me: shut up, i meant paul whatever his last name is that does our company taxes. you know the one that sings show tunes and takes his shoes off.

who searches this stuff? seriously. i’m party appalled and partly intrigued.

getting on the freeway today i saw a billboard reading “hell just froze over”. great, hell just froze over and there’s a demon in my windshield wipers. appropriate.

it was pouring rain this morning and my wipers wouldn’t stop making a clicking noise. i cannot stand car noises. typically, to fix them i just turn the radio up. this time the radio isn’t going to solve the problem–it’s that loud! it’s going to be a long, long winter.

i should have stayed in bed.

looks like i can finally stop bothering with wearing my pesky seatbelt. seriously. I am set fo’ life, yo!

with thanksgiving just around the corner, i’ve been given a taste of the kids table. everyone’s family is the same, right? grown-up table in one room, the kids table complete with the drunk uncle in another room. i was fortunate enough to be thrown with the kids for years. it’s cool, kids are way more fun, even if their conversations revolving around harry potter leave me silent– it’s still better than the alternative. the past few years i’ve been stuck with the adults, as hard as i tried to get around it, i was stuck in the adult work discussing republican politics. yikes!

last night the in staff went to the taste of utah, where we stuck out like sore thumbs. clad in jeans and a tee-shirt i was a little surprised and mortified to find it a suit and tie affair. i found our table and was relieved to find i was sitting at the kids table, conveniently located close to the bar and exit. i was content just not to be stuck anywhere near the multiple guys seen wearing bow ties. isn’t there a law that stops anyone under 70 from purchasing those? well there should be! the only bow tie i want at dinner is in a pasta salad.

i can keep my own with the perma tan crowd, i just need to know what i’m getting into. i keep extra make-up around for those events. however, i’m without aging stripper clothing. something i must work on ASAP!

when you work with geeks your day is filled with geek activities:
i don’t call him ddr for nothing!

go here to read this week’s column, unless you’re a family member of mine, then this week just skip it. trust me.

mom, i mean it. no dead turkey day holiday for you! i’ll stay in salt lake and eat at village inn. this is no idle threat, remember i like pancakes.

this was presented to me last night, and it’s quite possibly my new favorite thing! i’m keeping it with me always, and i don’t even smoke…