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i’ve loved the eels, since hearing novocain for the soul on one of my favorite movies, dreams for an insomniac (go figure). so, when i saw they were playing at the depot last night, it was a must. sadly flyboy was unable to make the show, something, something…emergency landing in some corn state; luckily justin didn’t have plans for the night and agreed to be my date as long as i was the designated driver. go ahead and get a feel for my enthusiasm:the band was amazing, complete with a band member whose dance moves would put napoleon dynamite and bruce lee to shame! that’s right, i finally understand the kung fu hustle; it’s not a just a movie kids, but a sequence of dance moves performed by the hulky onstage “security guard”. it was a good night, well except for the end of the evening when i fell down the stairs. i always joke that i can’t make it out of my house in the morning without getting hurt, apparently leaving a concert venue is the same story, different bruise.

for the record, this is justin’s ungloved hand, not mine! no dead man hands found here.

i’m going to the hill afb air show this weekend! i’m pretty excited since i’ve never been to one before, in preparation jb sent me a link to the site–where i found this little goodie:

The following items will not be allowed inside the 2006 Air Show:

Firearms/ammunition
Knives
Self defense weapons
Bows and arrows
Explosive materials
Disabling chemicals
Martial arts weapons
BB guns
Compressed air guns
Firearm replicas
Flammable Items
Matches or Lighters
Leatherman/Gerber type tools
Razor-type Blades/utility knives
Box cutters
Mace/pepper spray
Baseball bats
Ice Axes/Ice Picks
Rollerblades
Skateboards
Scooters
Alcohol
Pets

what a drag, the man is always taking away the fun element. damn, i guess i better go unpack the car. now what to do with those ice picks…

Benjaminoballbaby was here for the weekend, yeah again. All afternoon he was insisting we go to the pub; he too is addicted, however, for very different reasons–chicken enchiladas, not beer like his sister. I walked out of the room to find my shoes only to return to this:

Seriously, i was gone for two minutes and already he’s dead asleep. I think having a mullet and porn-stache are sucking the life out of the lad.

daisy, the one-eyed wonder, had a vet appointment last night. she absolutely hates the vet now, and really who can blame her…the bandits stole her eye. she’s hyper and happy to be there up until the point dr. barney walks into the room, then she runs for safety. it’s a little funny to see her huddled up in the corner, but mostly it’s just sad to see how scared she is. i guess i’d be freaked out too if i only had one eye left, and worried that they would snatch it at any given moment. you know the drill, it’s just like an appointment with your doctor, before you can see the vet you have to have a tech come in and take a few notes in the chart and whatever time wasting techniques they have to extend your visit. this time the vet tech was a new girl, yay for me! when she asked the reason for the appointment, i said “ she’s had some depth perception problems lately and i wanted to see what’s causing that”. i know, i know…i’m a horrible person, trust me, i’ve heard it all before. BUT, the look on her face was well worth the dose of bad karma. she was so confused, here is a dog with one eye and the owner is concerned about depth perception?

just one more office i’m going to be blacklisted from. awesome.

i met justin for lunch, mission:garden burger, destination:red robin. being the people watcher that i am, i couldn’t help but browse the crowd for something; just a little something, that’s all i ask.

camouflage. i know this isn’t the first time i’ve discussed camo, and surely it won’t be the last. it can’t be helped, there is just something about a man in camouflage, and that something typically involves some sort of dry-heaving on my part, today’s fella did not disappoint.

clear your mind of any images if you will– now picture a beer belly clad in camouflage (certainly not concealing anything), a handle-bar mustache atop his mouth, the mouth that blew me a burp, yeah, a burp. disgusting! i’m sure that mating ritual works in the huntin’ world, but not here. in the future, fucko, limit your nasty burp calls to the animal kingdom, and your manly man table. that would be lovely, umm thanks.

ice-cream, geez what did you think i meant? you dirty, dirty folks!

it’s a fine line between my neurosis and love of all things coffee. gray offered me some of his espresso coffee this afternoon, i hesitated for a moment, carefully weighing the situation–coffee vs. germs. surprisingly coffee beat potential gg contamination, is it possible that i’m becoming slightly less neurotic with age?!

don’t hold your breath on that one…actually maybe you should, just in case, or at least don’t breathe in my direction.

flyboy and i went to dinner last night at a little joint known as roosters; a cool little place, but it didn’t follow my no cocks at dinner rule. yes, i realize a place named after a rooster is bound to have them throughout the restaurant, but still…

it’s hard to pay attention to your dinner conversation when you’re waiting for your date to stick his foot in his mouth. you see flyboy has an excellent track record at doing just that. i’m not easily offended, so instead of getting upset i get excited. rest assured, the evening was a complete success! a man passing outside had on a puffy vest, flyboy pointed out how silly this was as it doesn’t keep your arms warm. bippity bam, guess who wears a puffy PINK vest all winter long…yup, me.

it’s nice to have something you can count on.

i hate litter. country carl knows this from experience; i was giving him a ride somewhere and he threw out a gum wrapper from the window. i immediately stopped the car, turned around and forced him out to pick it up–carl will not be littering again, at least in my presence. i live on a busy street, often there are asshats who decide littering the street is better than littering their car. whatever. when i saw a box on the curb last week i went to throw it out (yes pmk, i was planning on using massive amounts of sanitizer on my hands, industrial strength no less).
upon closer inspection i found a blow-up doll box! at this point i decided not to pick it up, sure we can say i didn’t want to touch it, but honestly i wanted other people to get that same shock factor!
either there is a dirty pervert out driving my street playing with his new “friend”, or one of my neighbors can’t get a date–a human one, that is. i’ve not stopped judging my neighbors since the incident. god, i love people.

that’ll learn him…