My Fifteen Year Old Self
Let me preface this by saying I absolutely love my mother. She’s the single most amazing person I know. She’s kind to strangers. STRANGERS! I’m rarely kind to people I know, let alone someone I’ve never met. As much as I love her, sometimes when I go home to visit I feel like a teenager again. Which would be fine if I had the ass and thighs to go along with teenage-Sarah. Currently I don’t, hence the problem. Here are just a few things she said over the weekend to prove my point:
“Why don’t you clean your room while you’re here.”
“What time will you be home?”
“Here’s money to pay for your dinner and the demolition derby.”
“Put your seat belt on.”
“Are you wearing a helmet when you’re on Carl’s bike?”
“Do you want me to french braid your hair?”
“Do you want money for gas?”
“The dress is short, just wear jeans under it.”
Comments
It doesn’t matter how old you are, going home takes you back in time. Your mom sounds like a wonderful woman. I see you come by it through genetics. Keep up the laughs.
“The dress is short, just wear jeans under it.”
Isn’t the dress being short the whole point?
My dress is short, wear jeans under it?
😉
You know.
Let me be the jeans under your dress!
SHOW THYSELF Anonymous! >:-(
Isn’t it kind of worth the mom comments if there’s cash included? “Here’s money for dinner,” is awesome!
Just saw my mom. She said I looked tired. “And why don’t you take a nap this afternoon?” A … NAP??? Am I THREE? No, I am in my forties. But shhhh …. I tell myself I can pull off pretending to be in my 30’s. (I can’t!)
Oh man, I want my hair french braided!!!!
totally shoulda took money for gas
my mom asked me if I wanted help buying my new cell phone. I laughed
You’ll always be her baby…
i think i love your mom! did you take the money?
I’m jealous! I wanted to go to the dirby. Maybe next time.
I’ve never really understood why anyone would willingly wear jeans under a dress, and yet I’ve seen it everywhere from San Francisco (in 1998) to SLC (in 2008).
I bet the french braid at the derby would have been hot. and perfect.
Aww…I love your mom. Once a mom, always a mom, I guess.
Forget my teenage ass and thighs, I’ll take yours now. Hmm…that sounds kinda dirty.
Ditto Pants on taking your ass and thighs. Also, reading this reminded me that I still don’t know how to french braid and will need to be taught in the next year or so.
atleast your a teenager, I always feel like I’m 12 when I go home. I guess that’s because I’m the baby of the family. I hope you let her french braid your hair, so pretty.
YOUUUUUU
YOU WHO SHOUT PROFANITIES TO THE ROOFTOPS WITH NO REGARD FOR THE WARNING SIGNS I’VE PRESENTED!
YOU WHO LAUGH WITH GARBLED SQUIDS AT THE MINUTE HAPPYGOINGS OF DAYS LONG PASSED!
YOU WHO IGNORE, YOU HALF-PAST KISSIN’ TIMES, PANTS, ROCKANDCOOKIES, MIDGES, FLAHUTES, AND SO HAVE YOU, HAVE BREATHED YOUR LAST!!!
O HO HO HO I AM NOT KIDDING!
🙂
O.K. this Trollpo(o)p is starting to scare me. You have breathed your last??? Is that supposed to be taken as a threat?
Time to start comment moderation Sarah.
I’m with Mike about the Trollpop character.
And that last comment was hilarious.. jeans with the dress.
AS if!!! ha ha ha ha ha!
I agree with Mike and Kate regarding Trollpop. He is creepy!
Block his IP address immediately. No reason why you should have to put up with threatening comments. I’ve admired your ability to leave cruel comments up in the past, but threats are a different story.
I forgot to mention..
My sister (who is married with 5 kids) got a pug.
She is THE cutest – best behaved dog – ever!!
She looks a lot like Daisy – but has both eyes – not to be mean – just to let you know what she looks like.
And she’s so huggably sweet.
Oh, and she swims.. we had her in the pool and she was lovin it!!!
When she got out, she just ran around in circles celebrating her excitement. LOL!
Aw, I love your mom!
My mom’s the same way.
Mom’s are the best!
I still get this…..and I don’t have the luxury of my mom living AWAY from me!
Sarah himself has threatened us many times with exploding fireworks and what have you.
I threaten no one.
😉
I have nothing but the severest form of adoration for Sarah Bellum and his motley pirate crew
I retract my statement about Trollpop.
I will retract my statement also since he means HER no harm.
ok, this is getting weird.
This one was best by far:
“Do you want me to french braid your hair?”
Always accept the money!! Always…