Welcome to my Life
September 17, 2008 at 12:00 PM
When I stopped dating Non-Troll Doll I decided there was no reason for me to change my grocery store. We’re still friendly with one another; so seeing each other while shopping is no big deal.
Last night was the first time I’ve run across NTD. I was in the cereal isle when I noticed him. So of course I said, “Hey douchebag, move your fucking cart; you’re in my way.”
And of course the man turned around and it wasn’t NTD.
And of course he was hot.
And of course I looked like a total asshole.
I apologized telling him I thought he was someone I used to date. He laughed and said, “Well no wonder you two are no longer dating. Most guys don’t like to be called douchebags.”
He did not ask for my number, how odd.
Comments
hmph. what does he know.
I’m sure Trollop would love for you to call him a douchebag.
I did that yesterday, I heard someone on the phone in the hallway at work, I thought it was my co worker so I started to blurt out something really bad – seen it wasn’t him and bit my tongue. As soon as I got in the office though I told the above story and still repeated the bad comment.
There are times when I have no sensor though – o’well 🙂
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Man, you have a story like this every week! I love it!
So awesome 🙂
That’s priceless. Stuff like that seems to happen to you.
The thing about sarcasm is that there is always a hint of truth to it, in how you feel or what you’re observing.
I have felt that frequent sarcasm (whether given or received) is just plain abusive.
Yeah, yeah… I know, I’m just being an oversensitive prick and I should shut the fuck up.
did he move the cart?
WHAT!? How could that NOT be a turn on!?!?!?
Oh shit. You have the worst luck with thinking people are somebody they are not! At least this one won’t get you in trouble with the pediphelia police…
He’s an idiot for not realizing a gem when he hears one (calling him a douchebag).
Between this and the poor teenager you molested with your words in front of the gym…
You seem to have a problem telling people apart from each other. Do we all look the same to you?
Oh sweet love of baby jesus and apple pie, that was HYSTERICAL.
You guys are right. This stuff does happen to me far too often. Keep in mind I’m from a small town, so I’m used to knowing everyone I see. That coupled with the fact I don’t think before I act/speak explains a lot.
I must dispel the age-old rumor which Shad, in perfectly understandable confusion, ignorantly perpetuates. I am not Non-Troll Doll, nor am I affiliated with any chocolate cake with raspberry filling. Before Sarah ever affectionately likened him to a Troll Doll, I was alive and well on this fine blog — after the two graciously parted, I remained. The alpha and omega of their relationship, if I may so liken myself to a Greek lettering system.
Secondly, considering the intimate nature of the Douche Bag and its rather sensual liquidy nature, I would find no offense to my being compared to such an object.
This is so great!!! And totally something I would do.
Haha. Sound like Sarah. In contrast, I love being called a douche bag.
Oh God. That sounds like something I’d do!
Ive had enough embarrasment for a little while.. last friday i got really drunk at a work thing, and fell flat on my face
I keep telling myself its OK because everyone else was drunk….
=o
HAHAHAHA. I don’t think you should have explained it to him.